*This post is created in collaboration with Vuori and ShopStyle Collective*
Ahhh, the New Year! A time for reflection, new beginnings, and a fresh start. It’s like opening a brand-new notebook with a freshly sharpened pencil, and the anticipation of what lies ahead brings so much excitement, and truthfully, a little anxiety.
This year, more than ever, feels packed with expectation.
Expecting to get back to ‘normal.’
Expecting to return to our ‘old selves.’
Expecting for life to look like it used to.
But what if it doesn’t? Last year certainly taught us that just because the calendar changes doesn’t mean life does. What if this is our new normal, and we’re missing out by waiting around for it to go back?
Restore Half-Zip Pullover (small) | Performance Jogger (XS)
Alpine Sherpa Jacket (XS) | Rib Studio Legging (XS) | Elevation Plyo Tank (S)
When it comes to the New Year, I’m not really one for resolutions… there’s something so resolute about them. Resolutions don’t really allow room for error or flexibility. It takes time to break habits, or change patterns and behaviors, and no matter how badly I want to make grand changes, I know I’ll stumble. And with that, comes a feeling of failure.
So in the last few years, I’ve allowed myself the time and space to slow down in January, and reflect on my patterns and behaviors of the previous year, and changes that could make a positive impact on my life, and therefore, those around me.
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Alpine Sherpa Jacket (XS) | Rib Studio Legging (XS) | Elevation Plyo Tank (S)
It usually boils down to one word… and it’s a word that comes barreling towards me and rolls over me like a freight train. (Be careful what you pray for, right?!) Several years ago, that word was RELAX. In every sense of the definition… relax my control, my grip, my expectations, my fears… it goes on and on. I needed to surrender.
The next year INTENTION was so loud in my head I looked around to see if someone was in the room (they weren’t). I was so busy juggling life, being a ‘master multi-tasker,’ that literally nothing got my full attention. That’s a startling and humbling realization. As a wife, mother, daughter, friend, business owner… none of those roles ever really received my full, undivided attention. Not for long anyway.
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Last year, rather than a single word becoming clear, the whole dang dictionary came flying at me! But how could it not after the year we’d had?!? Instead of living with intention, I was just trying to keep my head above water. And forget relaxing my grip, I white-knuckled my way through the last two years! Anyone else feel that way?
And here’s the thing… I’m a fixer. I want to jump right in with my opinion, advice, or a solution… whether it’s my kids, my husband, or the world in general.
My intention isn’t because I think I know best, but rather, I hate to see them hurt or struggling. But in the process, I bulldoze over their feelings with my band-aid. Which in the end helps no one, and results in frustration and resentment.
A couple of years ago, Mr. SP and I had several sessions of parenting therapy, and what I learned is more often than not, my kids just want to be heard and have their feelings validated. (Don’t we all?!) They need a safe place to express their storm of thoughts and feelings. And combine being a teenager with living through a pandemic, and that’s a pretty big storm!
So the more I thought on how I wanted to approach relationships, these words kept coming to mind… PAUSE. LISTEN. LOVE.
Rather than an immediate response and reaction when problems and heartache are presented… I learned to pause my own thoughts, and really listen to those of others. And in that pause, there is solace. Comfort. Understanding. Power.
Only after fully and completely listening do I respond, but instead of a ‘fix’, it’s simply love. Validation. Grace.
And you know what?! While last year was hard in a lot of ways, my relationships actually grew stronger by practicing this mantra of pausing and listening! Turns out my silence and acceptance can actually be the ‘solution’ they are looking for!? It still takes work, and oftentimes I don’t get it right, but when I pause and listen, the outcome is always better.
Restore Half-Zip Pullover (small) | Performance Jogger (XS)
Restore Half-Zip Pullover (My latest obsession!) | Performance Jogger (XS)
So now let’s get to 2022 and those pesky expectations. I realized I have been waiting to embrace life again, and I’ve lost touch with who I was ‘before.’ Granted much of it was necessary to be safe and a good citizen, but some of it has become a safety blanket.
While meditating over this new year, the phrases ‘live with gusto’ and ‘lambano life’ kept creeping up. Basically, create a life of FUN, REST, and PEACE, not one of WAITING. And if I want those things, I have to be the one to invest in my own happiness!
And what I realized was actually holding me back from that is SPACE. I’ve left no room in my life for the fun, the unexpected, the restful moments.
That’s not to say I schedule every moment of every day, but I don’t consciously leave SPACE for life to take over. I don’t allow SPACE in my heart for the big dreams. I don’t create SPACE for happiness.
I’m so busy pushing forward with my own agenda, that I’m not allowing God the SPACE to work His.
Alpine Sherpa Jacket (XS) | Rib Studio Legging (XS) | Elevation Plyo Tank (S)
Alpine Sherpa Jacket (XS) | Rib Studio Legging (XS)
So what does ‘creating SPACE’ look like? That part I’m still figuring out, and likely will for much of the year. But for now, I’ve starting saying ‘no‘ more often to things that aren’t essential, and ‘yes‘ to those that simply bring me joy.
And I’m realizing that even seemingly insignificant things bring that sense of joy, peace, and fun back to my life… like reading, journaling, long walks, lunch with a girlfriend, etc… things that I’ve left little SPACE for in the last few years.
Do you have a word or phrase for 2022? Or are you more of a resolution and goal setter?
This post is created in collaboration with a brand that brings me so much joy… Vuori Clothing! I’m grateful to partner with companies that encourage us to Invest in Happiness, and allow me to dig deeper and share my heart with you. If you haven’t tried their Performance Jogger yet, I can assure you they’ll bring you nothing but joy!
*Photos by the darling and talented Audrie Dollins.
Hi Cassie-this post really resonated with me. My word this year js Complete. My mantra for this year and last is: don’t wait. We’ve been on pause for the last couple of years in so many ways and yet expected to go full steam ahead in other ways. I really feel the need to tie up loose ends, to challenge myself to complete some life changing and life affirming goals this year. Thank you for always sharing your thoughts with the world. I feel like I just had coffee and a thoughtful conversation with a friend.
I love that, Jacki! And yes…go for it all!!
So good! Mine for this year is Abide. Over and over God keeps bringing me back to it and Him.
Isn’t it crazy how loudly He speaks when we create the space to listen?! Happy New Year, Jenn!
Ha! Totally feel the same. I don’t usually pick a word, but SIMPLICITY spoke to me earlier this month. I’m trying to keep my days simple, our meals simple, our house simple. I would love to here you achieve your SPACE throughout the year. May the Lord help you with your space and me with my simplicity.
Yes, Libby!! I love that word!! xo C
You articulated EXACTLY how I feel!!! I incorporated (always a work in process) PAUSE. LISTEN. LOVE. into my life a couple of years ago. AMAZING! Sometimes we just have to BE STILL! Thanks for sharing! You make a difference!
Thank you so much, Jeanette! Sometimes it feels a bit isolating talking to a computer screen each day, so it means so much to know I’m making a connection! xo. C
Keep your head above water is right-the Titanic hit your house! Niagara Falls happened in your garage!
I need to read your post here again, it’s good! Submit it to Parents/Parenting magazine, lady! Listening is love.
The same phrases come back to me over the years like, “Life goes on”, or “This too shall pass”. Or the song, “Hold on for one more day”. : )
Oh girl, bringing Wilson Philips to the conversation!! I love it! That song is now looping in my head all day 😉
I love this! I do a word each year as well. Last year my word was opportunity, I was moving to a new state (at age 59) starting a new job and I wanted to take advantage of all the opportunities that God had for me. This allowed me to apply for a new job by the end of the year that I never would have applied for in the past – and I got the job! So my word for this year is open. I want to be open to learn and grow in God’s word, my new job, and in life’s adventures!
Yes!! Congrats on the new job, Mary!! I know you will thrive this year!! xo. C
Good stuff here! I used to do one word as well, and intentional was that word one year. I find I am more into themes now. Currently I am developing language around mastering my craft for the Glory of God and to help others through The Woven Space. Interesting that you used the word space. Space is so important, both as margin in our lives and the atmosphere we dwell and move in. Both are essential to our well being. I HIGHLY recommend Redeeming Your Time by Jordan Raynor. His other books are fantastic as well! ❤️
Thanks for the suggestion, Starla, I’ll check it out!
Your words are so thoughtful and inspiring. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you so much, Rhonda! It’s humbling to look that closely at ourselves, but that’s where the growth happens!
Good message!
Thank you, Donna! Happy New Year!
I ready your blog every day that you post. Haven’t missed a post in years but have probably never commented. This post is by far my favorite post I have ever read! I needed it. And I am certain others reading it need it as well! I obviously started following you for the fun, fashion, home decor posts but this one hit my heart with such force! Thank you for sharing this…
Wishing you and yours a blessed 2022…
Thank you so much for reading each day, Stephanie!! Your support means the world to me, and I’m thrilled you continue to find inspiration here! xo. C
I love reading the process of choosing your word for the year. I go through a similar reflection time but in December. My word is FORWARD. I have a tendency to get too comfortable in routines that don’t serve me well, or get stuck in my head and can’t seem to get out. My word comes with a question… Are you holding yourself back or are you moving FORWARD?
I love that, Cheri! Moving forward definitely requires faith, and that’s not always easy to do!
Is that cute heart necklace from Kendra Scott?
Yes ma’am! I’ve worn it and the earrings non-stop lately! They come in a darling set, perfect for gifting: https://shopstyle.it/l/bDpth
I got my husband Vuiori shorts and joggers for Christmas (after reading about them here – THANK YOU!).
Well.. I bought the wrong SIZE. Once he got the correct size, he wears then ALL THE TIME. (I knew he would, per your recommendation). He just ordered a second pair of awesome shorts and a a zip up hoodie. I am so glad he splurged to get them. I can’t wait to see his hoodie when it arrives.
I want a pair of joggers and a zip up myself, but I will wait patiently for now!
PS – My kids think the joggers fit him funny. (I will just leave it at that.) He doesn’t wear them OUT. Not sure if all men find that.
So happy to hear that, Andrea!!! They are truly the best, I love that brand so much! You need to get yourself some joggers, girl! xo, C
I also have a son who is a college junior, as well as a son who is a high school senior this year, and so many of the things you mention here, I feel so acutely! I too am a fixer and yes, the pull to jump in and fix it all is all to real! Thanks for the reminder to pause and listen! College in this era and the more recent application process for son #2 has been a booger for sure!
It’s all so different than when I went to college… back in the dark ages, ha! Grateful to hear you found some solidarity in my post! xo, C
What a wonderful post! Certainly we all can relate on some level. I have picked words over the years for guidance, but last year I surrendered to the climate of the world and didn’t pick one. Felt like a ship without a sail. This year, no matter what happens, I vowed I would not let that happen. My word is consistency. I write it every week at the top of my planner. Main focus – consistency in caring for my health (movement/exercise) and my spiritual life (I’ve enlisted a “read the Bible in a year” program). I know a lot of other positive outcomes will show themselves if I can remain consistent (read progress not perfection) in these two aspects of my life. Thank you again for your voice (and margarita recipe!!) ❤️
This is wonderful, Kay!!! Such a good mindset to let consistency set the tone for your year! And maybe you can throw back a few margs while you’re at it! xo, C
Do you watch the Today Show? Hoda (host) is on a quest to Listen. Look up conscious listening! Love your intentions for 2022!!
Oohhh I’ll have to look into conscious listening, sounds great!! xo, C
I really love this one word (ish) idea! I didn’t make any resolutions because I tend to forget them as the year goes on. I’m going to start reflecting and see if a word comes to me as an obvious choice. Thank you!
Yes great idea!!! No need to put any pressure on yourself around it… just see if a word comes to you! xo, C
Love your word – space ! I’m going to give myself some space and show myself more kindness ! Love your blog and all things sugarplum !!
Hi Cathy!!! Yes absolutely, you deserve it!! xoxo, C
Love this! Intention was also my word for last year, and I felt that I didn’t have any control or room for it. This Jan started off with a storm of sadness & frustration. I have decided to not overthink it and give grace. Grace is my word. I feel we can all use a bit more. <3
What a perfect word for all of us to embrace this year!! xoxo, C
I love this! And can relate on too many levels. Can you recommend any parent therapy places in North Dallas?
We go to Connect to Thrive in Plano, and love everyone there!
I just started reading a book “The Power of Fun” by Catherine Price – and she speaks of making space and learning how to have “true fun” again – and being engaged in your life. I’m only a couple of chapters in, but you might like it!
Oh yes, thank you for this rec, Lindsay!!! xoxo, C
I’ve been thinking on the opening words of your post and the idea of going back to normal. I had book club the other night and one of my friends had just gotten back from Dallas – she told us that everyone was so welcoming, and how nice it was to not wear a mask and to see everyone smile. Now we all want to do a girls trip to Texas!
Texas has some really great spots, and Dallas is a perfect girls trip location!!! xoxo, C
I have tried in the past to choose a word but never was intentional in using the word or it’s meaning throughout the year. But in January 2020 I chose STEADFAST and little did I know a pandemic was right around the corner and I would lose my mom, my heart, early on on the pandemic.
I, through God’s help realized the importance of that word in my life that year. The word and it’s meaning were everywhere.
I like the idea from one of the commenters where she writes her word at the top of her planner every week. Great reminder.
My word this year is AWARENESS.
And btw I love the headbands and this post.
Have a beautiful day!
Thank you so much, Wanda! I am so so sorry about your mother. Awareness is such a great for so many reasons! Love and hugs to you. xoxo, C
I love everything you said! And now I’m going to focus on a few words that will help me with my goals! Such a great idea! I, too am a fixer and for some reason have guilt about relaxing! Peace, acceptance and courage all come to mind. I’m listening to Brene Brown’s podcast with the Author of Atomic Habits! The best idea from this book is “your current habits are perfectly designed to carry you to your results”. Thanks for being real with your followers! ❤️
A little late in the comment game but I just read this and wrote down Pause, Listen and Love…..I needed to hear that. My son just turned 14 and as you said, parenting and being a teenager in a pandemic is rough. I need to practice this…..I too am a fixer so I struggle to not comment, give a a suggestion and I know that sometimes he just needs to tell me who crappy it is and just to be there. I want him to keep sharing and so I will be practicing Pause, Listen and Love is hopes that he does! Thank you.
My word for this year is JOY. The past several years have been rough around here and I haven’t been able to find the same JOY I used to. I haven’t created the space, time or attitude to find JOY in things and this is the year.
Thank you for your lovely words!
JOY is an incredible word for 2022! Being intentional with JOY will be amazing!! Thank you for reading, Jill <3